thank you
for all the little things
I’ve left unsaid
(until now)

“the kiss that you would give me even though I was sleeping”
(I’m highly aware that’s a song lyric – can I steal it?)
so often before you left for work
they stopped many years ago
but they remain on my mind
and I am grateful

arriving home
I slow down to turn into the laneway
and there’s this moment
when I realize
you’ve left the lights on
(it feels so welcoming)

your routine
so perfect
allows for the cats
to always be fed, watered & cleaned up after
(how do you do it?)

the “how was your day”
even if your day was rough

for always
jumping to attention
to help
for when I really need it
(and sometimes, when I don’t)

the moments of complete stillness
when you listen to my ramblings
i look up
you’re still there
(I’m in awe)

the mail. the mail box.
your unfailing devotion to keeping it empty
so that I can reap the rewards

the library of books you’ve read
that stack you carry with you
you read John Gray before I even existed in your mind
then
Phil McGraw
Getting the Love You Want
The five love languages
Codependent No More
The Optimist’s / Pessimist’s Guide
(who’s who isn’t black and white)
Complexity while I read Simplicity
my first book recommendation
was positively accepted and conquered
and you liked it
what a feeling

the gifts you buy
out of obligation
speak volumes of “no”
and the ones you buy
just because
are so simply perfect

your daily discipline
to keep yourself healthy
your version of “self care”
inspires me

without fail
you go to work
and pay our bills
and provide me the ability to live without financial worry
untold amounts of gratitude every single day
(because of shame in “I can’t”)
and because putting it in words
would sound trite

(do you want to hear it anyway?)

and then words
so much easier than actions
and so I speak them
only in my thoughts

but oh,
that kiss.

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